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Seeing, Only Deeper
I’m just interested in stuff. In people. In things. In how things work. In how people work. In what I see and hear. What I read and find out. I guess you could call me naturally inquisitive. And what I find out, I write down. I take note (s).
This is funny because I don’t see that well. My eyesight isn’t that good. I attribute this to sitting in classrooms and lecture halls for many years and straining over text books at late hours. Plunking away at (yes) typewriter keyboards. In college I got ‘distance’ glasses. In the last year I have adopted reading glasses. And how I see what falls in between is any body’s guess.
But while my eyesight has gotten worse my seeing has improved. I notice things. Things other people don’t necessarily see. Maybe it’s just that I happen to be looking, but I think it’s more. I think it has more to do with attention.
Not that long ago I was very concerned about what others saw in me. Not on the outside; I’ve never been much of a fashion-plate. More, about what they thought when they saw what I was doing. Some people would call this ‘setting a good example’. Some would say I was being a ‘good role model.’ I would say, it got in my way. Concerning myself with those looking, impaired my eyesight. The things I was meant to see that I was missing.
More and more, I am just noticing things. And because I am inquisitive, I wonder about them. Yesterday, I arrived for our very small mid-week communion service (there are usually only a few people other than church staff in attendance) just as a cab was pulling up in front. Out climbed three older women who live just down the street in subsidized housing for elders. They opened their pocketbooks to pull out change to pay the fare they split three ways.
I wondered about this. Three women, so set on coming to worship, they handed over their last coins. They didn’t see me watching. Stuff like this, small stuff I just notice, changes me. And I take note. I think it’s helping me see.
Funny, I went to see the ophthalmologist last week. Hadn’t been in years, but my glasses weren’t correcting my vision as well as they used to. Dr. Rich did his evaluation. “Ok. Good. Uh huh. Try this one.” That’s all they say. You try your best but you never know whether you’re getting it right. He pulls the optical device away and says, “Well, your eyesight has improved. That happens in 30% of people as they age.”
Well, what do you know? My farsightedness is actually better than it used to be. My brain sensed this, but my eyes were deceiving me. Getting better with age? Not exactly, just a bit more focused. I think God’s like that. To tune in our senses, He just sheds a bit more light on the subject.